At last it's over

I am so happy!!!! Our case got terminated! We have been blessed, the judge ruled in our favor thank God.

My computer is down @ home so i'm here at work & can't be on much so I will def. come back in a few days and write some more.
THANK YOU ALL who had us in your prayer, you all will continue to be in mine too.

and so it's been a year now...

Dec 29, 2009.....

A year ago today I was scared, depressed, sad, did I mention scared? Last Dec 29 was my day to turn myself in... it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I knew that it was something I had to do, well as they sy you play you gotta pay. And so it was so that I had to pay. I was scared more than anything because I did not know what was going to happen with my hubbys case while I was gone. As he had court in January while I was going to be locked up. I was really scared of what would happen if he were to be deported while I was serving my time. I had been sentenced to 180 days, out of that I knew I had to do atleast 120 days. It was very hard having to say good bye to my kids, as I knew I wouldn't see them in all that time. I didn't want them to see me in jail, or even to know I was there. All that time they thought I was working in Colorado.

I remember clearly that evening, hubby went to drop me off at 7pm, it was a Monday. They didn't take me in till 9pm, and they had me downstairs in booking till 9am the next morning. As soon as they took me upstairs to a cell I feel asleep and slept all day long, I tried to sleep all day & night kuz when ever I was awake all I would do is cry.

I was in a cell by myself until the beggining of Feb, all that time that I was alone I spent reading the bible & reading everything and anything that was available to me. That way my day would go by so fast. By this time hubby had gone to court and they had given him another court date for June, I was to be out by mid April, so I was able to relax and not worry about what would happen.

While there I meet quite a few girls, it is so sad to be locked up, but more sad to be locked up and not know when and if you will ever be out. I went in knowing that I would be out in fur months, but there are people there that are fighting their cases and don't even know when they will be out, if they will be at all. I always pray for all of them, and since I've been out I've been writting to them, and sending them cards on the holiday, and their birthdays. It is heartbreaking to go thru these holidays knowing that they are all still there, specially for the ones that have kids. I am no one to judge any of them, and wheather they commited the crimes they are there for or not, I will always be praying for them and writting to them. I do hope and pray that they get to come out soon to their families.

I got to come home to my family on April 18, 2009. That experience away from my kids & hubby really taught me to treasure what I have. All this drama that hubby and I are going thru has brought us closer & stronger. We know we got ourselfs where we are, we know we are not perfect, and we have learned from our mistake. A very costly mistake. One that we can never take back. We are paying for it, and probably will for the rest of our lives, But we are both strong and have gotten so far, and with God's help we will keep on going.

As of today we still have no word on his case. But we are very hopefull that things will work out in our favor. For we know God has a plan for us, and we are patiently waiting for it.

At a time of joy we are in sorrow

So it was Sunday night about 10:30 pm, I was on line reading some posts when I get a call on my cell. I check and see that it is hubby's cousin Paul. He never ver calls me so I knew something was up. I answer the phone and sure enough it is bad news, he tells me mi Julian had passed away. Mi Julian is my hubbys maternal grandfather. But honestly I loved him like if he was my own grandfather. We named my son Julian after him. I know that always when people pass everyone says so & so was such a great person, pero honestly truth be told Mi Julian was a great person.

It really saddens me that he passed away and we didn't get to see him. It had been 2 1/2 yrs since we had seen him. He was here in the states last in June of 07, he was here when we had our wedding blessed.

The saddest part of this all is that hubby couldn't go due to our case not being resolved yet. It killed me to see how upset hubby was due to this. Mi Julian would come often to the States to visit, and he would stay here for months at a time, but since 2007 he was not able to come back to visit.

He passed away in Jocotepec, and they had his service in Las Trojes, Jalisco. In all the 14 yrs I have been together with hubby, I have yet to go visit El Rancho! Now when I do I will for ever be saddend that I never went when Mi Julian was still alive. He used to love attending Los Torros, and I am sure if I had gone to Mex he would of taken me to see them May he Rest In Peace.

Mi Julian you will always be in our hearts!

We will miss you always!

So we decided that while we wait for what ever the outcome is we will move out of our home, into a different home where the rent will be less, BUT so will the space. I will need to get rid of a lot of stuff, so thank God for craigslist hehehe! I've been posting like crazy most of the items I will need to get rid of and we've been having sales every weekend for the past 3 weeks. We already got rid of the big items we needed to get rid off like our China Hutch, or Dinner Hutch, a desk, 2 sofa chairs, and lots more. But I still do have lots more to get rid of, we are going from a 3 bedroom, 2 bath, living room, dining room, laundry room, kitchen, and 2 car garage to a 2 bed, 1 bath 1 sm. kitche no car garage place :(. So saying that YES there was a lot to get rid off. Oh and to top it off we are moving upstairs agh!!! the hassle of moving everything upstairs! So let's just hope that we do end up staying here.

All hallows eve...

A year ago this day I was super dupper depressed being that hubby was still detained around this time.

Thank God this time he is home with us and we where able to take the kiddos out trick or treating like past years.

Here is a couple of pix of that day!

Coco~Tirrin

Julian~Julissa

Julian & Julissa

Me & Hubby

Missing my Daddy!!!

So this year was my daddy's 10th anniversary of being gone. He passed away on August 15, 1999. But due to the fact that his body wasn't found until the 17th his death certificate says his last day was the 17th. It was and has been very hard to live without him. We all miss him so much! There has been occasions when I totally feel his spirit is here with us. Like when we had our marriage blessed, I totally felt his hand on my shoulder. I know that was him.

Well here we are, a couple of days before "El Dia De Los Muertos." This is my first time doing an altar for him. I plan on making this a new tradition for our family. Here are a couple of pix:

To be or no to be... to have or NOT to have.... These are def. the ?'s

Well Saturday night I was as always trying to catch up on the blogs I am following... And oh my it really got me thinking :(

Here I was Saturday morning going about my usual Saturday morning routine, took the kids to cathechism and left to see some yard sales.... I was so excited kuz I found a doggie stroller for Bimbo for only 10 bucks (what a deal) kuz it's in real good condition practically new, and those run for about 70 bucks new.

Anywho I got that and then I found some Xmas decorations, as anyone who knows me knows I really don't need any more Xmas decorations I already have tons! But ofcourse i bought them... I love decorating for any holiday, specially for Xmas.

So I go about my day....

Then there I was late at night reading the blogs when I go to Melissa's blog (Living on Refried Dreams) and there I was crying & crying.... This last post really hit me hard. I love all of her post, she writes in a way that makes me feel like I am there actually seeing with my own eyes what she's writting about, living what she's living...

So she talks on this posting about the change in life from living here in the states to moving to Mexico, she mentions how when she was here in the states she had lots of Xmas decorations and well how different todo es, how material things sgouldn't matter that much to us, and well it all got me thinking about everything, if we loose our case and have to relocate to Mex I'm gonna have to get rid of most our belongins and well I must admit that really saddens me a lot, even when I know it's just material stuff that I can do with out, and if we where to win our case :) it got me thinking how we don't need all that material stuff how even if we get to stay I need to just get rid of a lot of stuff & be happy knowing that what's really importnant is not how much you have (money wise, decorations, all that) si no what's importnant is that we are healthy and together as a family UNIDOS!

Julissa"s 5th Birthday

So here we are yet another party, when I know we should be saving every little penny we can, for we don;t know what is going to happen come October :( But then again we can't let the day go by unnoticed for our lil one. Thank God we have family that helps us out! Grampa Moises chipped in 4 the chicken, abulita Gloria bought the cake & did some rice & some jellos. I had already done some in lil spongebob cups, hence it was a Spongebob Bikini Bottom Party! Maggie did the potatoe salad & some rice. Julissa had a blast, origanally we were not going to have nada since she wanted a bike, and well we couldn't afford both a bike & a party, pero gracias a sus tios Pedro & Martina (they gace her the bike) we was able to have a lil something 4 her. She got quite a few gifts of Hello Kitty so now shes says ke pa next birthday she wants a Hello Kitty party hehehe ay estos kids!

Ok so it's been sooooo long since I've posted. Between being gone for about 4 months, and then when I was finally back being busy @ home & work. I haven't really been able to make time to get on here and post. Even though I have had a lot going on. So I might just backtrack and add stuff later on. For now let's worry about right now hehehe!

Well my mother in law (MIL) left on Saturday. It was a very bittersweet moment. I know that she left with NOT the best memories of me, but I also know that she will remember the good old days, before all the drama happened. When we used to live in peace. Way before all the gossips, chisme, shit talking crap. The good thing that she knew the old me, way before all the drama and all. Seriously I know a lot of people think I'm a real bitch, but like I've always said I can be the sweetest person or the meanest bitch. I treat people as they treat me, no ifs ands or butt's. It is what it is.

I am sad about her leaving kuz of my kid's, they were so used to her, since Julian was 8 months old, she had been here. So when Julissa was born she was here, and the kids are so used to her. And well even though hubby really didn't spend time with her a lot, I know it hurts him kuz she's his mother and he loves her.

Happy Mothers Day

Tengo mucho ke agradecerle a mi kerida madre. Claro lo primero y mas importante eske el ke me alla traido a este mundo, se ke sufrio mucho para consevirme y mucho mas a sufrido por lo mal portada ke e sido. Pero aun asi siempre me a kerido y a estado a mi lado en las buenas y en las malas! I LOVE YOU AMA!!!
Me encontre esto en un sitio y me facino...
aunke no realmente me a sucedido ay va....

Mi madre me enseño:

RELIGIÓN.- "Mejor reza para que esta mancha salga de la alfombra".
LOGICA.- "¡¡ Por que yo lo digo, por eso ... y punto!!"
IRONIA.- "Sigue llorando y te voy a dar una verdadera razon para que llores"
SER AHORRATIVA: "Guardate las lagrimas para cuando yo muera"
OSMOSIS: "Cierra la boca y come"
CONTORSIONISMO.- "Mira la suciedad que traes detras de las orejas".
FUERZA DE VOLUNTAD.- "Te vas a quedar ahi sentando hasta que te termines las espinacas"
METEOROLOGIA.- "Parece que un huran paso por tu cuarto"
HIPOCRESIA.- "Te he dicho una y mil veces que no seas exagerado"
CICLO DE VIDA.- "Te traje a este mundo y te puedo sacar de él"
VENTRILOQUIA.- "No me rezongues, callate y contestame: ¿Por que lo hiciste?ODONTOLOGÍA.- "Me vuelves a contestar y te voy a sacar los dientes de una bofetada"
RECTITUD.- "Te voy a enderezar de un solo guantazo"
Nunca podre pagarle lo que me enseño.

Happy Birthday & Welcome Back 2 Me

So I am sooo happy to be back home :) This picture was taken Sunday April 19th, I just came back home yesterday and since my birthday was on the 16th we had a little get together to celebrate my birthday & welcome back. Look at my Julissa how tall she got, her hair grew oh so much too. And my Julian he's taller too. I am so glad everything went well and that I'm able to be back home. So my buddies came over to see me I missed them all so much. It was really good to see them all & be able to spend time with all my loved ones. Como dicen por hay cuando cais en el hospital o la carcel ay saves bien quien son tus true friends. I love you chikas!

Time with family...

So we went to celebrate Johanas birthday today. Notice how it's all girls except my boy. When I was pregnant from him, I would think "who is he gonna play with". Pues no avia more baby's in the family. So a little after more babies where born, pero as you can see mostly girls. In this pix estan from left to right: Julian 6, Yesenia 2, Julissa 4, Yesenia 4, and the birthday girl Johana 5. Being that Julian loves to take pictures he took this picture of hubby & me. Aren't we the cutest couple of all....

Mass for El Señor Del Monte

So as promised to El Señor del Monte, we attended the mass they had in his honor today. We left the house about 10am because I wanted to get there early so I could pay my manda. Which was to walk in the rodillas. So we get there around 11:10am. There is a mass going on, so we wait around for that one to be over with. I see this lady get there with a beautiful basket with non-perishable food, and I tell her ke I didn't know we had to put the food in a basket, and that the bags of pasta I had bought for the kids to give de ofrendas was on a regular grocery bag. She tells me not to worry that it's the thought that counts, so I just have the kids walk with the bag down the aisle when its time to give the ofrendas. I know now for next time. Because trust me there will be next time, every year from now on si Dios me da licensia we will be heading out there for the yearly mass they do for him. So as we are entering I walk in on my knees, man was that painful, pero aun asi I get all the way to the altar, with my kids and hubby next to me. The whole mass was so beautiful, they had mariachi and dansantez. The father explained very well everything to be known about the Juramento and all. He was reading off the novena book, like the one I have that Griselda gave me. When it was time for the ofrendas to be taken to the front Julian was so embarrassed as it is he is very shy. Nothing like me :)~

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Sooooo here it goes, I was told by Matt that court was @ 10:30am. So I pick up my mom and brother @ 8:15 am, from there we pick up Socorro and head out there. By the time we get there it's about 10:10am. As we are getting checked in I see Matt comming out. I get very sad because I think "Oh my court is over and I didn't even get to see my honey." So Matt has a big O smile on his face and tells me "You should be a very happy woman!" So I ask what happened? He says he was able to get a bond for Isrrael, oh my God I just started crying I was so happy. My mom is all like "Ke paso mija ke dice" So we tell her and she starts crying too. We are all hugging Matt. Gracias Sr. Del Monte! Ahora si te cumplire mi promesa! So there starts our journey hahaha to try to do all we needs to do for the bond ASAP. We drive back to Santa Paula to drop off mom and Socorro, then brother and I drive to Oxnard to meet up with my father in law. We end up getting to Los Angeles at 2:10pm. We are told it's too late to process anything so we have to come back tomorrow. By the time they tell us this it's about 4 om already, so we drove back home. By the time we get home it's about 7 or 8pm.

.... Next morning at 6:00am we leave home, we get to LA around 8am. By 10:30 the bond is paid and all the paper wprk on this side is taken care off. So we drive to Lancaster, by the time we get there it's 12pm. We stop by to eat, then head out to the Metrolink. We are there from 1pm till 7pm when he finally gets dropped off there. It is soooooooo wonderful to finally be able to hug, kiss, and hold him. I really do love my baby daddy! So finally after 78 days & nights, we where able to be together again. The kids, oh the kids get so excited when they see him. In the end all this wait paid off kuz again we are all together, Gracias Diosito!

Trunk Treat...

So here we are, ready to go trunk or treating! This is the 4th year we go to this one church. It's a Christian Church, and what they do is they have people from their church come and park in the parking lot and they have games for the kids, then they give them candy. Beats going from house to house, here we go from car to car. The kids love it. They also have a jollie jumper for the kids.

Tio Rica

So after we get home from abuelitas, the kids get all excited because Tio Rica is there. He knows Julian loves Starwars, so he bought the kids some toys! Ke lindo, gracias tio Rica!!! My kids are very lucky, mas bien they are very spoiled. Since they are the first nietos, and the first sobrinos, they have always been so spoiled by they grandparents and tios. They are very lucky!

Well where to begin...

Should I start 32 yrs ago when I was born? Or 13 years ago when I met hubby?
Well I guess from the beginning, but not all detailed

or I will be here 4 ever & ever and ever...
I was born 32 yrs ago to a wonderful couple my momma and my papa!

When I came into this world they already had Jenny. She is 4 years older

than me. Two years after I was born, brother

Juan Carlos was born. This is a picture of him

when he was hmmm I think maybe about 3.

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Seven years after Juan was born my mom got pregnant. I remember the night hew was born, I was only 10 yeras old. But I do remember she was was walking back and forth while watching the novela. Don't remember what novela she was watching. Then we went to sleep, and next morning when we woke up she was gone. So daddy took us to the hospital, and thru a windo we were able to see him. He was the only newborn with hair the other ones were baldies. LOL. We got to choose his name and we decided on Oscar, daddy wanted Jesus, so mom named him Oscar Jesus. Here is a picture of him.

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I believe he turned 5 here. I actually baked the cake.

... Years later in 1995 I met my hubby.

We met in April of that year & moved in together soon after. We got married in 97.

In 1999 my father died, that was one of the worst days of my life.

R.I.P.

Jose Trinindad Manzo

06/14/47 - 08/17/99

In 2002 we had our firstborn Julian Jasiah. It took us seven years to be able to get pregnant. So finally when I came out we where really excited. I had been in treatment for 2 months y nada de nada. Hubby went to Mexico for 2 weeks, so I didn't take the treatment the 3rd month. Kuz I figured he's gonna be gone 2 weeks, no need for treatment. So he was back on Oct. 5th. Around Oct 27th I started feeling ill. I had a sharp pain on my side. I tought maybe it was my appendix. So I went to the Doctor to get checked, and holly behold! I was told I was pregnant! Wipeeeee!!!

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This picture of Julian was taken, when we had our marriage blessed. Isn't he a cutie??

So two years after Julian was born we had our daughter Julissa Monet. She was born oh so tiny, pero a como a crecido! She too was a blessing, because I thought I was only gonna be able to have 1 child, because I keep on telling God to please bless us with a child eveb if it was only one. So when I found out I was pregnant again. I was so excited. Here is a picture of her

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This picture was also taken on the day we had our marriage blessed. She totally is a mini me! Es tan corajuda, and oh my gosh than gritona, and she slams doors and all. I really have to work with her pa ke no sea tan asi. Mom always told me ke one day I would have my own children y todo lo ke e echo I will end up paying for. How skurry is that!

On June 16 2007 we had our Marriage Blessed.

Now other than when our children where born this was one of the most happiest days of my life!!!I had waited all my life for this day. Even though it was a extremely happy day for me, it was also a very sad day as my daddy wasn't here physically with us. But I know his spirit was there as it always is.